Ramblings of a Non-Native Texan

Today, I had a 20-minute drive through the rural Texas countryside to take my kids to their soccer camp and back. A handful of things struck me as interesting enough to share when I got back, so here they are…

First, I was behind a woman driving a pickup truck. In Texas, this is common. It wasn’t a work truck; it was a clean, shiny, my-toy-is-bigger-than-your-toy truck, bought (as so many are) because it looked good, not because the owners had any intention of hauling anything larger than a handbag with it. The truck itself wasn’t notable; what stuck out was the giant lettering drawn on the back window. In glaring white shoe polish, it read: “You Broke the FAMILY!” Now, when you see shoe polish writing on cars, it tends to be of the more positive variety, like “Just Married” or “Go Seniors!” The condemnation of this mobile message made me wonder two things: one, did the woman ACTUALLY break her family, and two, why didn’t she wash those words off as quickly as possible?? After a bit, she changed lanes and headed down I-20, taking her scarlet letter with her.

Second, I passed a horse trailer. Again, lots of those here. And this one had a horse hanging his pretty brown head out the window. He couldn’t get his whole head out, just the bottom half of it, but he pushed that much out anyway. As I went by, he glanced at me, and then turned his attention to the wind blowing past at 70 mph. He looked like a dog sticking his head out the window. The breeze caught his floppy horsey lips, and they started to wiggle madly. I couldn’t help laughing at the sight of this beautiful horse letting his lips flap in the wind.

Third, I took the kids through the McDonalds drive-thru after I picked them up. There was quite a line (lots of trucks, of course), but eventually, we made it to the pay window. I reached out to hand my money to the lady waiting there, but then she startled me with a loud “Whew!” and I took a better look at her. She was a middle-aged, pudgy woman with a few teeth missing, but she had more than the average allotment of enthusiasm. “I swear!” she exclaimed as she took the money I tentatively extended. “We shouldn’t let men go through the drive thru! They can’t handle it, can they!” Then she laughed and muttered something else while she handed me my change. I laughed nervously, took my coins, and pulled forward to the food window as quickly as possible. Fifteen seconds of interaction that will definitely stick with me for a while.

For a short drive, there was a lot to see. This is some colorful territory, especially if you know where to look!